Thursday, January 8, 2009

Healing Relationships Brings Happiness & True Love

“Your greatest guru is the one who causes the maximum trouble in a relationship,” declared the gentle but powerful Sri Samadarshini, Director, Oneness University.
Sri Samadarshini: powerful insights Sri Samadarshini: powerful insights A human being has five primary relationships: with parents, spouse, children, self, and God. Of these the relationship with the spouse is the most complex and demanding. A common cause for the deterioration in marriage is the unresolved hurt engendered between the partners. Her guidelines for resolving hurts and healing relationships include acceptance of the situation, looking at the other in the eye when he/she speaks, feeling for the other and experiencing their pain (pray for strength, she advised) and finally response (not reaction). Sri Samadarshini’s mantra for healing relationships: “Put the other person’s happiness before yours. True love is possible only when giving.”

Moving on to one’s relationships with parents, she explained that all relationships in life reflected one’s relationships with one’s parents. Even failure in disparate events in a person’s life such as career, finance, and relationships are attributed to dysfunctional relationships with one’s parents.

Sri Samadarshini said that parents play a vital role in shaping their child’s destiny. She exhorted parents to treat their children as “kings and queens” until seven years of age (no to discipline!), and most important, to treat them with respect. From the ages of seven to 14, they were to be treated as, “princes and princesses”, where discipline is applied with love and honesty, never harshly or with punitive methods. From the ages of 14-21, parents need to treat children as their friends and as an equal thereafter.

Relationships with oneself and the Divine are higher order relationships that are indicative of the flowering of individual consciousness. “Relate to the Divine in any way that comes naturally to you,” said Sri Samadarshini. Her insights and powerful presence were so trans formative that the visibly moved participants, many of them with tears in their eyes, gave her a standing ovation.
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Contemplative Questions

Here is a set of questions that would provoke you and put you through some soul searching. They are not about religion nor about ethics. They are merely about you.

They are not meant to serve as solutions nor are they meant to lead you anywhere. These questions are meant to serve as tools to discovering yourself.

1) Do you perceive the Presence of a benevolent force guiding, protecting and shaping your life? What name do you give that Presence? When did you best feel this Presence?

2) What is your opinion of God? Is your opinion drawn from religion, books, parents and or your personal experience of life?

3) Do you pray? Do they get answered? How often?

4) Do you think it is possible to relate to the Divine? What relationship would you opt?

5) Here is a story for you - Two fierce enemies once did a penance to placate god and receive boons vying with each other. God appeared to the first man and asked what he wanted. He said "give me twice of whatever you give my enemy". Then God appeared to the second one. Even before God could say anything he asked, "God, would you please tell me what my enemy asked for? On knowing his prayer request, he said, "then God, blind me in one eye."
Now what would you wish for yourself, your best friend and your worst enemy if God gave you a chance?

6) Have you ever experienced a coincidence or chance that seems to have involved so many people and factors that you can't stop wondering if a mastermind was behind this operation? If yes, do you savour the experience often and have you shared it with someone close to you?